I really hate hate hate people who push me in trains or when they're getting in/out of the train. seriously can't people just open their mouth and say something instead of pushing. seriously. its SUPER annoying. and i hate it. i really eish i could slap or punch the person who pushes me. grr!

If you're thinking about something, does it mean you're not feeling anything as much? If your brain is occupied with thinking, how is it then that there is any space for it to be feeling anything. How then do we feel any emotion toward the things that we are thinking about. When we're feeling emotional about something, how is then that we are able to have any logical thinking toward it. An emotion would be a feeling and not a though right. When i have a feeling toward something, it means that im letting my heart take over the thinking and im not lettin my brain think in a logical manner right. So the more i like something, the more emotional i become. That means that i dont think about it. After all, thinking is a period where i use brain to think and not my heart right. So if im not able to split my mind into doing two things at a time. That means when im thinking about something, i wouldnt be puttin my emotions into it. That means im only gonna be changing from a thought to an emotion. So if thinking and having emotions are different, would it mean that thinking would just be like an extended attention on how the mind works. oh wells.

xoxo<3


The stars they seem to shine so bright,
they seem to shine,like you.
To me, the night seems so dull.
But amongst the dull, i see you light.
You bring the shine, you bring the light.
And best of all,you bring the smile.
But stars they don't shine every night.
At times the clouds, they cover you.
And those are times i'll neve see you.
If only i could climb up to the sky,
and see your every inch, and every point.
Even if i couldn't pluck you from the sky,
at least i'll see that shine every night.

Alrighty! so yestrday was SUPERSTAR NIGHT at zirca! haha! went with eunice dear! and shino dear brought us in!(: so it was goodddd! luckily shino was there to bring us in if not i would have totally freaked. i know shino always tells me not to do those stupid things but i don't know why i always still end up doing it. but anws i owe shino alot.thanks shino(: oh andddd, actually eunice's friends were supposed to join us but they didn't in the end! rahh. but we still had a hell load of fun! <3 When we first got there, it was pretty empty so we ended up getting drinks.shots,martinis,ok i cant remember what else we got. but it was fun! we should have gotten more to drink first dear! <3 NEXT TIME OK! haha! then the crowd started coming in. which made things better!! after hanging out for abit. we headed right down to the dance floor!! <3 enjoying our twosome for abit. then until those straight guys started it. we were a lil concern so i asked if they were gay before that. haha! (: there were a few cute hot guys but they started holding their partners hands. haha!(: then we got up to the platform and there was this guy. eunice dear and i , we were totally cool with him at first.until he started taking and grinding us. and fuck.his hands.and he was not singaporean. though kinda close but yeah.not good.and he kept wanting to buy us drinks and getting our number.but he was not appealing at all. EFF HIM RIGHT EUNICE DEAR!?! grrr. (: and as always i did stupid things in the club. fuck it. anws some pics below.






The rest of the photos are on face-bookieee! eunice dear! <3 you can get them to tag themselves alright!!? lovee you! <3

i dont know how things ended up this way. i really liked how we started. it was like an endless flame of fire. everything we had just seemed so real cause it always just flowed so naturally. but i don't know what happened in between. it was gone without a trace of anything lingering behind. you left without a word nor a sound. do you call this irresponsible or did you plan it right from the beginning? i thought you'd give me that chance to experience the real thing all over again. but i realize that i was wrong. it was wrong from the beginning wasn't it?? all the time i see you these days. that irky feeling comes back. i see you looking over but i dont see whats in your mind cause i can't read it. but anws im so over it. you used to make it hurt so bad but now all the feeling comes and goes. i don't even know why im feeling this way and whether its because if this im feeling this way. i think its just the accumulation of everything thats happening right now that makes me feel the way im feeling. the feeling sucks and momentary fun times take me away only for that specific moment. but once im back to reality, everything just goes back to where it started. nothing changed. these are times when you realize that moments of fun lead to hurt.

as always, i was just seeking shino's opinion on something and he asked me it depends on what i want and that made me think. cause i really don't know what i want. i dont know how i sld be feeling or what i sld be wanting. its like a maze where you just cant see your ending and sometimes everything just goes in a circle and you'll never find your way out of that black hole.

its such a long day today!tutoring after work. it actually goes the same every week.

on a side note, i was out lunching with mae the other day and we were just discussing about money vs happiness. and mae told me she'd rather money cause its more realistic. and i used to disagree with her but now i realize that its true. money can indeed lead to happiness. how often do you hear people fighting/ quarreling over money? how often do you find yourself being troubled over the lack of it. how often do you find yourself smiling when you have it solidly with you. the convenience it brings. now i really feel the great importance of it cause thats the thing that makes you survive and thats the thing that makes the world go round. the thing that differentiates you from someone who frowns over day compared to a person who smiles everyday. it really makes things different. sorry about today mae!! another day k? love youuu!! <3

HURRY HURYY MUAH CHEE!! :D

xoxo<3

Working from Starbucks again drinking my lovely carrot juice!! i like!(: haha! I REALLY LOVE THE RAFFLES CITY'S STARBUCKS! (: haha anws had to wake up early for 2 meetings today and they were all in the east. not too fun at all but it was an experience. and i REALLY hate squeezing in the train early in the morning.especially from my side, its like really crowded all the time! rahh! and i totally have to push people. haha!(: super horrible right. yeah i know. anws its like one more hour till the end of work and then i've gotta go off for tutoring! late nights everyday!! and my eye is so uncomfy! i have no idea why! but its really uncomfy. i dont like.

anws i was at the east side just now for some meeting. and guess what horrible thing i saw when i was at the bus stop! There was this old lady waiting for a taxi and then suddenly i think this woman came out from dont know where and stood where the old lady was at and hailed a cab. NOT FOR HER BUT FOR HERSELF. wtf. seriously. i mean seriously, does she have no heart or no conscious or something. and this old lady was with a walking stick. doesn't she realize that people with a walking stick means they cant exactly stand for too long. Thats why they actually spend some dough and get a walking stick for themselves. Mann what was that woman thinking. I totally regretted not opening the taxi door and ask her what it was about totally. She should totally be ashamed of herself. I don't get how people can be so horrible toward these old folks. I mean don't they feel guilty after that. I mean they totally should. Plus the sun was so freaking hot just now. OMG im getting so frustrated just thinking about her action just now mann. Such a bitch seriously. Seriously, she should have totally been ashamed of herself. This is why the society is getting so horrible all the time. Its cause of people like that woman. GOSH. hate her. Although i dont know her, her action was just horrible. WAY horrible. people should totally treat these old people better.

omg im falling asleep.so so sleepyyy. i bet if i close my eyes now, i'll totally just fall asleep.seriously. i hope i last through tuition! i have no idea why ive been feeling so sleepy these few days! rahh! must be cause of the late nights mann. gosh! totally need sleep! haha! i should totally sleep early today cause its gonna be a LONG day tmr! haha! and a fun day in fact i hope!!(: HAHHA! OMG CANT WAIT!(: seriously. haha!(: wisht the hours would just pass faster faster! (: YAY!(:

YAY! muah chee is back from her sydney trip!!! ahhah!(: excited if our plan works!! maybe either this week or next ok!? (: heheh! YAY! and its lunch with mae tmr! cant wait cant wait!! then there's tuition again tmr and then YAY! fun at night! hahha! eunice dear cant wait to see you and do crazy stuffs with you!(: haha!!

have fun today anws lovess!(: YAY!(: anws gonna leave my job soon cause i have to. think i'll totally miss it<3

are you gonna pick up that white dress? are you gonna really put everything down and only hold on to that one hope that you would be left with after wearing that white dress? Do you really think that white dress would bring you a whole life time of happiness. Cause i've looked around and seen that white dresses don't mean nor bring along with it anything. At times im sure it did bring a whole life long of happiness. but really how much does it weigh. How much weight would it bring along with it. if it's real, make me believe.

xoxo<3